Today marks the 3rd anniversary of my first ever blog post. Three years ago I never really considered how my blog would evolve into what it is now. My family and friends still read it, which was one of the reasons I started writing it, but now I have other readers too, up to 100 that seem to keep coming back (on a good day) with my current most popular post getting over 300 views in a week (which is fairly unprecedented for this little blog). It’s not just my blog that has changed in that time; I have too.
Introductions are a very strange part of the adoption process. They are the final step before you become full time parents. You are taken so far out of your comfort zone that there really is no going back to it, yet at the same time you seem to be required to behave like well-rounded, calm, experienced parents. You also have to put your trust in the foster carer who has the child or children you are being introduced to in their care. It’s fairly normal for you have already met the foster carer, whose house you are going to be camped
Our story began at an event held for LGBT Adoption & Fostering week in 2014. Yours can begin this year…
It’s a question I always make a point of asking my Eldest son after he has spent a day at nursery. I have always asked it, I even tried some of the more specific questions about who he liked playing with today, or what the best thing he did today was, but the most detailed response I have ever had was “I played with the boys and the girls”. Until now…
As I’ve learned over the last couple of years, parenting is full of self-doubt and guilt. We do things the way we feel is right but that doesn’t stop you questioning yourself and wondering if it really was the correct way of going about something. We feel guilty about things we do ‘for their own good’. So, in an attempt to combat this here are some things which I have done, but I am not sorry for doing, even if I do feel guilty about doing some of them. I am not sorry that after you took over an hour
Is it just my children that don’t really have favourite things? They have ‘transient’ favourites certainly, where the thing they’re playing with at the time is their ‘favourite toy’ if asked, but generally they have never had that one thing that they gravitate back to, or can’t live without. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t think this is a massive problem. I’ve seen parents of children who are too attached to a blankee or particular toy with panic in their eyes as their little one is having a minor meltdown because 5 minutes ago they dropped it on the floor
A slight break from my normal post style again. My Eldest son got this book for his birthday. It is aimed at children slightly older than he is, but he has such an appetite for reading and books that we went with it to see how he got on. This review has two sections, one from my perspective, one from my son’s perspective (based on my observations). The Parents’ Perspective I loved reading this book out loud to my son, it has two stories in it “Rainbow Bear” and “Little Albatross”. It is written in such a way that ‘performing’ it
If you’re a foster carer you’ll be overly familiar with what an IRO is. If you’re an adopter you may not know. Every child that is in care will usually have an IRO – Independent Reviewing Officer. They are meant to be there, amongst other things, to ensure that the best interests of the child are being represented and that everyone is doing their jobs properly. Every few weeks/months a child in care will have a LAC (Looked After Child) review – which is a meeting that is meant to have all the main people involved with the child there
For many of us Christmas is a time of joy, a time for family, a time for giving and a time of unity. For others of us it is a time of stress, a time of emotional dysregulation and a time of disruption.
This year will be our second Christmas with our boys but it’ll be our eldest son’s 4th and our youngest’s 3rd in their lifetimes. I don’t think we really appreciated how big a deal a stable Christmas with the extended family and lots of presents was until last year. It was something both my partner and I have always had, so it is the norm for us, for our children though it was not. It started to hit home a little bit with the lack of excitement from our eldest the night before. I know it was only his 3rd